Shijo-Tsushin #20 March, 2000
People Call Me a Kikokushijo (Returnee)
This article is compiled from discussion in the Japanese section of our Bulletin Board.
The English section of the BBS is here.
MiwaThe expression "you are different" usually has a negative connotation in the Japanese society. I don't think all the expressions like "unique" or "different" conveys the negative messages, but I often lose confidence in myself and feel very sad when other people make a fuss about my opinions and behaviors.Not many people seem to know what's really important to them. You act like others because you don't want to be labeled as a strange person or you don't know what you really want to do. Having your own virtues could be your advantage to support yourself, although it may get in the way when you have to behave like others. In Japan the rule that an individual must follow the rules of the group (or the minority must go along with the majority) is emphasized too much. I'd like to find the good side of the Japanese society, however, and I hope that the relationship between the individual and the group will get better.
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The Nails That Sticks Out Too Much Does Not Get Hammered Down |
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AndyHello to you all. I am a 21-year-old male and a college student (majoring in clinical psychology) living in Kansai. I went to an Australian high school as a private exchange student for 3 years, and it's been about a year since I returned to Japan. It took me a year to conquer my reverse culture shock. Right after I came back, I tried to be friends with the students in the same college, but I just couldn't be myself and decided to have my own way. There is a saying that "The nail that sticks out gets hammered down", but I came to think recently "The nail that sticks out too much does not get hammered down." In other words, rather than assimilating to Japan in halfway, it is much easier to behave as you like.If you have self-confidence, it wouldn't matter where you live. It is important to be proud of what you've accomplished so far and learn from it for the better future. You get tired if you pay too much attention to what others say to you. Don't tire yourself like that; it would be much better for you to be yourself. Experience with another culture is a treasure you can be proud of. I hope we can all cherish it and make use of it in the Japanese society.
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